Fly Me begins by introducing its three main characters whom are stewardesses or flight attendants if you will. Toby (Pat Anderson), Andrea (Lenore Kasdorf) and Sherry (Lyllah Torena) are all working a flight headed to Japan. Once in Japan, Sherry is for some reason abducted and the other two girls set out to find her.
During the search for Sherry, we learn that Andrea is a kung fu master who has the ability to fight-off highly trained ninjas. OK, maybe they aren’t ninja’s, but they dress in black and appear to be so. We also see that Toby’s mother is a royal pain in the ass and never for one minute lets Toby, whom is a full grown woman, out of her sight, let alone have dinner with a male counterpart.
With the film coming to a close, rather quickly I might add, the plot point is revealed and Toby’s doctor friend becomes a kung fu killing machine in order to rescue his beloved girl. A girl he doesn’t really know, thanks to her over-bearing mother. We also get to see this kung fu doctor work his way through dozens of professionally train kung fu artist. Yeah, it could happen.
OK, I admittedly enjoyed this film by the time the end credits rolled. Yeah, the god-awful kung fu fighting scenes were laughable and the scenes with gun-fire even worse. In fact, all the action sequences were terribly choreographed and at first un-enjoyable. But how often are you going to come across a film that contains beautiful stewardesses that know kung fu and get naked often during a film? Never! Besides, I just turned my brain off halfway through and really enjoyed the film for what it was, an early 70s exploitation classic. And that’s exactly what you have to do when going into this drive-in cult classic, turn your brain off and enjoy.
Fly Me was directed by Cirio Santiago and written by Miller Drake. It was released by New World Pictures in 1973. Cirio Santiago was a name I wasn’t familiar with and in looking at his resume, I see he kept very busy after Fly Me. He directed films such as Savage (1974), TNT Jackson (1974), Cover Girl Models (1975), She Devils in Chains (1976), Vampire Hookers (1978) and Naked Vengeance (1985) to name a few. As a writer, Miller Drake changed professions just after two films. He went on to do visual effects in films such as The Abyss (1989), Terminator 2: Judgement Day (1991), JFK (1993), Cliffhanger (1993) and True Lies (1994) to name a few. Miller Drake is still working in the business as a visual effects artist today.
Thoughts In My Head:
- I’d like to fly you
- LOL, Dick Miller as the taxi-cab driver
- These stewardesses are a clumsy bunch
- Time to join the mile-high club
- A Japanese dope and sex party. I bet we see some small cock here
- If this guys a doctor, I’m a Chinese fighter pilot
- Umm, this is the worst kung fu ever
- Wow, seriously, the worst kung fu fight ever
- Does this film even have a plot?
- So far the only great thing about this film are the occasional boobs
- More terribly bad kung fu fighting scenes
- Finally, some signs of a plot. Smuggle the drugs in and get forced to prostitute
- This plot is paper thin. But wow, the boob count is starting to climb
- I must have missed something, I thought this lady and her daughter was in Japan not the Philippines
- OK, Fly Me is about drugs and sex slavery
- It’s about time the plot rears its ugly head
Favorite Badass or Badass Moment: Sorry kids, no badasses in this one
Favorite Boobs or Boobs in a Scene: I’d have to say Toby’s
Favorite Death Scene: Every death scene in this film is fantastically bad, I lov’em all
Boob Count: 13 pair
Body Count: 9
IMDB Rating: 5.4 / 10
My Rating: 5.0 / 10
Final Thoughts: Fly Me is an exploitation film at its core. There are plenty of deaths throughout the film to satisfy the average action fan and plenty of boobs to satisfy the average pervert. It’s a film I recommend as long as you turn the CPU off before starting it.