Badasses, Boobs and Body Counts

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The Plot: Fit to Kill begins with Donna (Dona Speir) and Nicole (Roberta Vasquez) sun-bathing in bikini’s under a waterfall on the Hawaiian Islands somewhere. While this is happening, we see two armed men slowly approaching the girls through the bush. Once Donna and Nicole are dressed and armed, they spot and shoot the two would-be assassins with paintball guns of all things, and then narrowly escape a missile equipped RC helicopter attack. After this, the four agents are called back to the meeting zone as this has all been a training exercise put on by the leader of L.E.T.H.A.L., Lucas (Tony Peck).

We’re then taken to Las Vegas where Kane (Geoffrey Moore) is having sex with Silk (Carolyn Liu). Outside of his hotel room is assassin Blu Steele (Julie Strain). Steele finds her way into Kane’s room shooting him in the back only to find he’s wearing a bullet-proof vest. Kane then hires Blu Steele as his own assassin (because she’s so good at what she does I suppose) and sends her out for her first kill.

Back in Hawaii, the L.E.T.H.A.L. ladies have been given orders to meet and protect business man Chang (Aki Aleong). It seems that Chang has acquired a rare diamond known as the ‘Alexa Diamond’ and the diamond itself has a deep rich history and actually belongs to the Russians. Chang would like to return the diamond to its rightful owners and needs the L.E.T.H.A.L. ladies for security purposes as there may be others after the diamond (Kane?).

The Takeaway: Color me surprised, but Fit to Kill was a real enjoyable film, more so that what I anticipated it to be. It will come as no surprise to fans of Andy Sidaris that all his regulars come out to play in this new spy adventure. Along with the regulars, we also get a couple of new faces to look at, in particular, the beautiful Julie Strain as Blu Steele and the menacing Aki Aleong as Chang. Both perform rather well considering the linear script that Sidaris had written and while the story is fairly straight forward, there are a few bright spots that turn this standard adventure into something more, if compared to previous Sidaris productions. As far as the film goes, and from a technical standpoint, there are a few continuity errors throughout but the films direction, editing, cinematography and production as a whole is serviceable.

Film Facts: Fit to Kill was written and directed by Andy Sidaris and was produced by Arlene Sidaris. The film was distributed by Malibu Bay Films and was released in 1993. Fit to Kill brought a couple of fresh faces to the Andy Sidaris stable of performers. With well over a 100 appearances in film, Julie Strain (Blu Steele) fast became known as the Queen of the B-movies. She also appeared in Penthouse magazine as Pet of the Month for June 1991 and afterwards was Pet of the Year for 1993. 1993 was a very busy year for Strain as she appeared in 10 films, two of which were Sidaris directed productions, Fit to Kill (1993) and Enemy Gold (1993). Strain also appeared in films such as Out for Justice (1991) and Beverly Hills Cop III (1993) to name a couple. The second new face, Aki Aleong, appeared in numerous TV productions starting as early as the late 50′s spanning to current day. Some of the shows include The Outer Limits (1963), Airwolf (1984), Cagney & Lacey (1986) and Hunter (1988) to name a few. He can also be seen in the Jean-Claude Van Damme directed The Quest (1996).

As a side note (thanks Arlene), the Alexa Diamond used in Fit to Kill was designed by Alexa Sidaris (now Alexa Garner Sidaris and daughter of Andy and Arlene). Alexa also worked as a jeweler on The Dallas connection (1994) and Day of the Warrior (1996). She performed as a production assistant in Hard Hunted (1992) and as production services in Do or Die (1991). Alexa has since moved on to open her own fine jewelry shop in Manhattan. You can visit Covet Jewellery and have a look at some of the beautiful jewelry she’s crafted.

You can find out more about Andy Sidaris and his films at the Andy Sidaris Website run by his beautiful wife, Arlene Sidaris. You can also visit my review of Hard Ticket To Hawaii to learn a little more about Andy Sidaris.

Thoughts In My Head: - KSXY radio = topless DJ’s - I’m pretty sure Kane doesn’t like women - Blu Steele is HOT! - Nicole has a huge caboose - The flirtatious dialogue does nothing for this film - Why do bad guys mark everything with personal bad guy logos - Missile equipped RC helicopters are really getting popular - Apparently, killing is as fun as playing video games (yahoo, I got’em) - I love Donna’s dress (no, I’m serious) - Oh no, Edy is singing (turns down the volume) - Is Edy Stark related to Tony Stark in any way - Damn, Julie Strain is tall - Evel and Knievel are the names of the hit-men, OK… - I’d love to have a dune buggy - Oh my, Ava gives new meaning to “Got Milk” - The thug watching Kane and Donna just fell asleep on the couch - Big boobs + running = joy - It’s the Matrix, only with missile equipped RC helicopters - Cover me, OK, so she jumps on top of him covering him (funniest bit of the film)

Favorite Badass or Badass Moment: Blu Steele, she’s so bad, she’s bad Favorite Boobs or Boobs in a Scene: Blu Steele (Julie Strain) Favorite Death Scene: The boat explosion at the end of the film (two for the price of one)

Boob Count: 13 pair Body Count: 15

IMDB Rating: 2.7 / 10 My Rating: 4.0 / 10

Final Thoughts: The addition of both Julie Strain and Aki Aleong lend some freshness to what was becoming an otherwise tired motif. Had these two new faces not been part of this production, Fit to Kill may have suffered as being a bland Sidaris film.

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The Plot: Hard Hunted begins in the Hawaiian islands when Kane (Geoffrey Moore) receives a small Buddha-shaped jade figurine while on his boat. He tells his sexy female companions, Silk (Carolyn Liu) and Mika (Mika Quintard), that the figurine is the worlds most valuable object and that it will make him a very powerful man. Once the figurine is locked away in a safe place (in the boats safe), Mika slips a sleeping agent into Kane’s drink and then proceeds to steal the figurine removing it from the boat.

Meanwhile in another part of the islands, we’re introduced to Ava (Ava Cadell) who works as a DJ at KSXY radio (in a bikini no less). Ava’s so-called partner, Edy (Cynthia Brimhall), works at the adjoined club as a singer/dancer but also has a tie-in with KSXY radio as she freely comes and goes from the radio station. It’s here we learn that Ava and Edy are Federal Agents who use the radio station to communicate messages to other operatives via the airwaves.

Next we’re introduced to Lucas (Tony Peck) who manages the team of L.E.T.H.A.L. from the Pentagon (this is the agency the girls belong to). We’re told that the jade figurine stolen from Kane actually contains a deadly nuclear weapon trigger known as a ‘claistron relay’ and if acquired by Kane, it would complete a nuclear weapon that Kane is having built. This of course would mean certain doom and the girls aren’t going to let that happen.

The Takeaway: God bless Andy Sidaris. I knew from the moment I started Hard Hunted that I was in for a good time and that I wasn’t going to have to worry about high production values. Right off the bat we get Cynthia Brimhall as Edy doing her lounge act in a skin tight outfit (with boobs nearly bursting out). Then we meet Ava (played by the stunningly beautiful Ava Cadell) whom works as a DJ in a bikini (I mean this woman might as well have been naked). Then there’s the office assistant who fetches coffee in a skin tight red-leather bikini. Had I known that women in radio dressed like this, I would have changed my major to communications real quick.

If dressing for work nearly naked wasn’t enough, then hold on, because later in the film they actually do work naked, well, almost naked. Ava proceeds to do her radio show from a hot tub topless alongside her topless office assistant. It seems that Ava works from wherever she wants wearing whatever she wants. She just totes along that cordless microphone sending coded messages to other agents. And naturally, while the other female agents are supposed to be standing watch for the bad guys, they always end up naked having sex with their male counter-parts. All that being said, does the story or production quality of Hard Hunted really matter? No, it doesn’t. God Bless Andy Sidaris.

Film Facts: Hard Hunted was written and directed by Andy Sidaris and was produced by Arlene Sidaris. The film was distributed by Malibu Bay Films and was released in 1992. At this point in the Andy Sidaris filmography we’re starting to see similar plot lines and faces. Back in Hard Hunted are Donna Speir, Roberta Vasquez, Bruce Penhall, Cynthia Brimhall, Al Leong and Rodrigo Obregon (all whom have appeared in previous Sidaris productions). The only newcomer is Geoffrey Moore, whom replaced Pat Morita as Kane. As a performer, Geoffrey Moore is lackluster to say the least and as I stated below “Kane is the single least threatening bad guy in cinematic history (even worse than Erik Estrada)”. As an actor, Geoffrey Moore only appeared in one other film after he appeared in Hard Hunted , and that’s Andy Sidaris’ Fit to Kill (1993).

Thoughts In My Head: - That’s it, tease us with lesbian sex - Edy, you can’t sing worth a shit, seriously… But you look fantastic! - I really want to work at KSXY radio - Al Leong’s fumanchu is amazing - Cole (Buzzy Kerbox) couldn’t act his way out of a paper bag - BOOM MIC! - Pico’s pirate patch is so awesome - Sexy time with Edy - This jade Buddha must be terribly important - OK, now the KSXY disc jockey’s are working topless, YES… - Ava Cadell’s boobs are glorious - Kane is the single least threatening bad guy in cinematic history (even worse than Erik Estrada) - More sexy time with Edy - While we’re waiting for the bad guys, lets have sex - More sex on the beach with Donna - The more films Dona Speir does with Andy, the less she gets naked, for shame… - There’s a million people on this VERY SMALL ISLAND yet no one can find Donna - As a L.E.T.H.A.L. lady, Silk is completely worthless

Favorite Badass or Badass Moment: Al Leong for playing the part of Raven Favorite Boobs or Boobs in a Scene: Ava, what an amazing rack! Favorite Death Scene: Cole’s death. Nothing beats a machete through the chest, right Jason?

Boob Count: 10 pair Body Count: 14

IMDB Rating: 2.6 / 10 My Rating: 4.0 / 10

Final Thoughts: Hard Hunted is a slightly below average film from Andy Sidaris. There’s a lack of depth to the story and the pacing feels a bit off at times (in other words, slow). These things however can be over-looked with all the half-naked women who at times go to work that way.

Next Episode 12/17

Podcast Listening Portals Follow BB&BCs via Email Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email. Join 932 other followers Like us on Facebook! Recent Posts BBandBC Podcast EP61 – Nude Nuns With Big Guns BBandBC Podcast EP60 – The Magnificent Butcher New BBandBC Capsule Reviews Web Site BBandBC Podcast EP59 – Even Dwarfs Started Small BBandBC Podcast EP58 – Bloodsucking Freaks BBandBC Podcast EP57 – The Sinful Dwarf BBandBC Podcast EP56 – The Terror of Tiny Town BBandBC Podcast EP55 – A Fallen Angel at the Manchester Morgue BBandBC Podcast EP54 – Willard BBandBC Podcast EP53 – Cannibal Holocaust BBandBC Podcast EP52 – The Big Doll House BBandBC Podcast EP51 – The Vanity Double Feature BBandBC Podcast EP50 – Attack of the Gorilla Beast BBandBC Podcast EP49 – Visitor Q BBandBC Podcast EP48 – The Spook Who Sat by the Door BBandBC Podcast EP47 – The Deadly Weapons of Agent 73 BBandBC Podcast EP46 – Bio Zombie BBandBC Podcast EP45 – Happy Birthday To Me BBandBC Podcast EP44 – Logan’s Run BBandBC Podcast EP43 – Scream Queen Hot Tub Party BBandBC Podcast EP42 – The Ghost and Mr. Chicken BBandBC Podcast EP41 – The Black Godfather BBandBC Podcast EP40 – Meet The Feebles BBandBC Podcast EP39 – Tenebre BBandBC Podcast EP38 – The Milpitas Monster BBandBC Podcast EP37 – Batman: The Movie BBandBC Podcast EP36 – Sharky’s Machine BBandBC Podcast EP35 – Humanoids From the Deep BBandBC Podcast EP34 – The Funhouse BBandBC Podcast EP33 – The Beyond Blog at WordPress.com . The Parament Theme . Follow Follow “Badasses, Boobs and Body Counts” Get every new post delivered to your Inbox. Join 932 other followers Powered by WordPress.com Send to Email Address Your Name Your Email Address Cancel Post was not sent - check your email addresses! Email check failed, please try again Sorry, your blog cannot share posts by email. %d bloggers like this:

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Recent Posts BBandBC Podcast EP61 – Nude Nuns With Big Guns BBandBC Podcast EP60 – The Magnificent Butcher New BBandBC Capsule Reviews Web Site BBandBC Podcast EP59 – Even Dwarfs Started Small BBandBC Podcast EP58 – Bloodsucking Freaks BBandBC Podcast EP57 – The Sinful Dwarf BBandBC Podcast EP56 – The Terror of Tiny Town BBandBC Podcast EP55 – A Fallen Angel at the Manchester Morgue BBandBC Podcast EP54 – Willard BBandBC Podcast EP53 – Cannibal Holocaust BBandBC Podcast EP52 – The Big Doll House BBandBC Podcast EP51 – The Vanity Double Feature BBandBC Podcast EP50 – Attack of the Gorilla Beast BBandBC Podcast EP49 – Visitor Q BBandBC Podcast EP48 – The Spook Who Sat by the Door BBandBC Podcast EP47 – The Deadly Weapons of Agent 73 BBandBC Podcast EP46 – Bio Zombie BBandBC Podcast EP45 – Happy Birthday To Me BBandBC Podcast EP44 – Logan’s Run BBandBC Podcast EP43 – Scream Queen Hot Tub Party BBandBC Podcast EP42 – The Ghost and Mr. Chicken BBandBC Podcast EP41 – The Black Godfather BBandBC Podcast EP40 – Meet The Feebles BBandBC Podcast EP39 – Tenebre BBandBC Podcast EP38 – The Milpitas Monster BBandBC Podcast EP37 – Batman: The Movie BBandBC Podcast EP36 – Sharky’s Machine BBandBC Podcast EP35 – Humanoids From the Deep BBandBC Podcast EP34 – The Funhouse BBandBC Podcast EP33 – The Beyond

BBandBC Podcast EP61 – Nude Nuns With Big Guns

BBandBC Podcast EP60 – The Magnificent Butcher

New BBandBC Capsule Reviews Web Site

BBandBC Podcast EP59 – Even Dwarfs Started Small

BBandBC Podcast EP58 – Bloodsucking Freaks

BBandBC Podcast EP57 – The Sinful Dwarf

BBandBC Podcast EP56 – The Terror of Tiny Town

BBandBC Podcast EP55 – A Fallen Angel at the Manchester Morgue

BBandBC Podcast EP54 – Willard

BBandBC Podcast EP53 – Cannibal Holocaust

BBandBC Podcast EP52 – The Big Doll House

BBandBC Podcast EP51 – The Vanity Double Feature

BBandBC Podcast EP50 – Attack of the Gorilla Beast

BBandBC Podcast EP49 – Visitor Q

BBandBC Podcast EP48 – The Spook Who Sat by the Door

BBandBC Podcast EP47 – The Deadly Weapons of Agent 73

BBandBC Podcast EP46 – Bio Zombie

BBandBC Podcast EP45 – Happy Birthday To Me

BBandBC Podcast EP44 – Logan’s Run

BBandBC Podcast EP43 – Scream Queen Hot Tub Party

BBandBC Podcast EP42 – The Ghost and Mr. Chicken

BBandBC Podcast EP41 – The Black Godfather

BBandBC Podcast EP40 – Meet The Feebles

BBandBC Podcast EP39 – Tenebre

BBandBC Podcast EP38 – The Milpitas Monster

BBandBC Podcast EP37 – Batman: The Movie

BBandBC Podcast EP36 – Sharky’s Machine

BBandBC Podcast EP35 – Humanoids From the Deep

BBandBC Podcast EP34 – The Funhouse

BBandBC Podcast EP33 – The Beyond

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